 | I will not play tug-of-war with Dad's underwear, when he's on the toilet. |
| The garbage collector is not stealing our stuff. |
| I do not need to suddenly stand straight up when I'm lying under the coffee table. |
| It is ok to leave my food in the dish while eating. |
| I will not always stand where Mom is trying to walk. |
| I don't have to eat my treats on the carpet. |
| I will not roll my toys behind the fridge. |
| I must shake the rainwater out of my fur before entering the house. |
| I do not run circles on the family room carpet with muddy paws. |
| The family hamster is not inviting me to play. |
| My bed is not on top of the freshly folded laundry or the living room sofa. |
| I will not eat the cats' food, before or after they eat it. |
| I will stop trying to find the few remaining pieces of clean carpet in the house when I
am about to throw up. |
| I will not throw up in the car. |
| I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc. |
| I will not lick anyone's face after eating animal poop. |
| "Kitty box crunchies" are not food. |
| I will not eat any more socks and then redeposit them in the backyard after processing. |
| The diaper pail is not a cookie jar. |
| The trash box is not for treasure hunts. |
| I will not wake Mommy up by sticking my cold, wet nose under the covers. |
| I will not chew Dad's toothbrush and not tell him. |
| I will not chew crayons or pens, especially not the red ones, or my people will think I
need to see the vet immediately. |
| When in the car, I will not insist on having the window rolled down when it's raining
outside. |
| We do not have a doorbell. I will not bark each time I hear one on TV. |
| Any leftovers on the dining room table are not necessarily mine. |
| I will not steal my Mom's underwear and dance all over the back yard
with it. |
| The sofa is not a face towel. Neither are Mom & Dad's laps. |
| My head does not belong in the refrigerator. |
| I will not bite the officer's hand when he reaches in for Mom's driver's license and car
registration. |
| I will not eat the yellow snow. |
| I will control the expulsion of gas when visitors arrive.
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